Dear Friends In Christ,

 So many of you have been in prayer for our son, Gregg, over the last year.  I wanted to share his story with you.

 Gregg started drinking alcohol as a young teenager in the late 1970’s.  By July 2,001 he was diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver and told that if he did not stop drinking, he would not live to see his 40^th birthday.    However, he continued to drink and in September 2,001 he was rushed to LSU Hospital almost comatose.  The doctors there gave him a 72 hour window in which he either would live or die.  Ed and I rushed to his bedside fully expecting to bring him back to Texas in a coffin.  But, the Lord chose to spare him and we brought him back home, sitting up in the car eating a “burger”.

 He stayed at our home for 6 weeks and was getting better, stronger, eating well and staying sober.  Our pastor came to see Gregg at least once a week and they had lunch and talked and Gregg’s faith was renewed.  The family managed to find an alcohol treatment program that we could afford, but Gregg would not attend and eventually returned to Louisiana and to drinking.  Over the next several months, his wife begged him to return to the hospital but he refused.

 Meanwhile, our pastor continued his ministry with Gregg by sending him tapes of each Sunday’s sermon.  I know Gregg listened to them and I feel he knew he was dying because he kept calling me with questions about heaven and death and eternal life.

 It was the middle of May 2,002 and we had gone to Houston to see one of the daughters of  our middle son, Grady,  graduate.  He had just returned from seeing Gregg and  shared with the rest of the family how bad off Gregg was and that he probably would not make the next two weeks.  We drove to Louisiana the next day.

 I don’t know what I expected to see, but this man I saw was not “my son”.  He was sitting on the couch, could not even get up to answer the door.  He was emaciated from his head to his chest.  His head looked like one of those “shrunken heads” you see on TV or in magazines.  His arms were as small and skinny as the starving children you see in third world countries.  His abdomen was as huge and hard as a beach ball.  From the bottom of his feet to right above his knees, he was swollen three times the normal size and the coloration was beet red. 

 I knelt in front of him, took his face in my hands and said “Gregg, this is most important, I have to know.  What do you believe about Jesus Christ ?  Do you know Him as personal Savior or is it just a story you remember from Sunday School ?”

 He said, “Yes, Mom.  I know, I believe.  I know He came as a baby, grew up, died on the cross for me and rose again and that He will come back some day, I know! But I’ve never done anything for Him, I’m not worth His time.”  I then explained that he was still God’s child, that he was loved unconditionally and then Ed and I prayed with him.  We stayed the weekend urging him to let us take him to the hospital, even telling him that he was dying, but he would not go.

 I’ve been saved since I was nine years old, but I must confess that I was so mad at God.  I was heartbroken and  could not see past anything except that my baby was dying.  Although “self inflicted”,  he was still dying.   We then went through the sad task of making Gregg’s funeral arrangements.  I got over being mad at God, and then got mad at Gregg for doing this to himself.  The next phase was deep sadness and seemed to last the longest.  I cried all the time.  I’d pray and leave it with the Lord, but then I’d pick it back up again.

 During the next 5 to 6 weeks Gregg was almost completely bedridden.  His wife, Teresa had to help him out of bed, he had to wear diapers, etc.   After much prayer, Ed and I finally got to the point of resignation to Gregg's death and then finally “Praise the Lord’ we got to the point of surrender….Thy Will Be Done.

  It was July 2,002 by now and we felt that we must get word to Gregg’s estranged children about his condition so I called his ex-wife so that she could prepare his children for his imminent death.  She felt it was too much to tell the younger children and so she only told their 17 year old son, Gregg Jr. who rushed to his bedside and tried in vain to get him to a hospital. Then the night came that Gregg could not breathe. His son picked him up, took him to the car and he and Teresa got Gregg to LSU in Shreveport.

 This is a great facility with some wonderful personnel.  Gregg was there for two weeks as they tried to stabilize him and he has been sober ever since.  He knows that his liver is diseased beyond repair but he says whatever time he has left, he doesn’t want to live it in a fog.  Our God is an awesome God !

 In September 2,002  LSU did a procedure that would help make Gregg's last weeks more comfortable.  A temporary stent was inserted to help distribute the fluid forming in his abdomen, to other parts of his body.    This helped tremendously and Gregg was upgraded from “imminent death” to “guarded”. 

 He and Teresa came home for Thanksgiving and all the extended family gathered at Ed’s brothers home to see Gregg for what they thought was the last time.  At Christmas, all our immediate family went to Gregg and Teresa’s for, again, what we thought would be our last holiday together.  It was a blessed time!

 But after the first of this year, Gregg had outlived his temporary stent and was found to be a candidate for a T.I.P.S. procedure.  Hard for me to understand but is a more permanent stent that aids the diseased liver that can no longer do its job.  Barring any complications this could last for a few years as long as Gregg doesn’t drink again.  He may even, some day, be a candidate for a liver transplant.

 We had three different doctors tell us last July that Gregg would not live to see his 40^th birthday, but we all know the power of prayer and how it can change things.  Ed and I were with him on March 8^th to celebrate his 40^th Birthday.  He looks so good !  He can drive short distances, he is eating 4 or 5 small meals a day, he is walking, laughing, and praying.    Teresa says she knows he has some pain as he can’t sleep lots of nights and others she hears him groaning, but he does not complain. We do not know what lies ahead for Gregg, but we thank God for His mercy, His grace, His unconditional love and the miracles He still performs in our lives and hearts. 

“Keep Looking Up”.

 Glenda Graves

“His love has no limit, His grace has no measure,

His power has no boundary known unto men.

For out of His infinite riches in Jesus,

He giveth and giveth and giveth again.”

(Annie Johnson Flint)

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Dear Friends In Christ,

  Our son, Gregg, passed away on March 5, 2005.  We thank you again for all your thoughts and prayers over these last few years.

  It has been two years since my last open letter to you all and I’d like to share some of the events of Gregg’s last few weeks on earth. He was never much of a complainer, although we all knew he was in very much pain, but he called me one day in February and told me that he was not feeling well much of the time and he thought the end was near and would I pray for him not to be a “baby” about it. 

 The next three weeks he was in and out of the hospital and they were trying desperately to help him, but it was not to be.  One of the doctors at LSU finally told him that they had done all they could do and that Gregg better get his “affairs in order”.  He called here that Monday night and was so very upset.  He had known all this time that he was dying…but now had been told his death was not only imminent…but it would be soon.  Ed and I both talked to him and tried to comfort him. It was so hard to know what to say and to keep from breaking down ourselves. We told him that we would make arrangements to come to Louisiana.    He had lost all hope, it seemed, but God was in control.

  The very next morning, Tuesday, the original Dr. that performed the TIPS surgery on Gregg was in town. ( his home hospital is in New Orleans and he only goes to Shreveport two or three times a year.)  He and his staff were making rounds and he saw Gregg’s chart and stopped by to see him.  Gregg told him how afraid he was and that he was going to die any time now and Dr. said, ”Not on my watch, let me see what we can do.  We’ll continue to build your system up and we may can operate and do a new stint by Monday.”   Whether or not the Dr. really thought this could happen  is not known, but he renewed Gregg’s hope.  My, I could feel Gregg smiling through the phone line when he called here that Tuesday morning and told us to wait until the weekend to come because they were going to do another surgery on Monday.

  Wednesday was probably his best day in a long time. Then on Thursday evening, his wife, Teresa, called and said that the Dr. told her that the family needed to call, come, make funeral arrangements, or whatever they needed  to do because Gregg was failing fast.

  Several of the family got to talk to Gregg on the phone that night.  He was not real lucid, but he did know who we were. I told him that we would be there tomorrow and he was so happy.  We left Weatherford early Friday morning and by the time we got to the hospital, some of Gregg’s children were there with his grandchild. 

  Gregg was not comatose, but he did not talk or move.  His eyes would open every once in a while but that was all.  Gregg’s wife, Teresa, had been at his bedside for days with little or no sleep.  I finally got her to agree to go home and get some much needed rest and that I would stay with Gregg through the night.

  Before they all left, Ed went to Gregg’s bedside and was talking softly to him and holding his hand.  Ed told me later that he believed Gregg could hear him and Ed  told him that it would be okay to go ahead and go with Jesus.  We would all be okay and would see to it that Teresa and his little girl were taken care of. It was close to 9:00 p.m.

  A work friend of Teresa’s came by around 9:30 and we talked for a couple of hours.  Such a sweet Christian lady and she insisted that I try to get some sleep and she would keep watch for a while.  I did sleep some, but woke around 1:00 a.m. and she was still there keeping vigil.  She left a few minutes later and I stood by Gregg’s bed and talked to him, sang “Amazing Grace” to him, told him how very much he was loved.

  They had him on a breathing machine and his breaths had been very even all night.  But by 4:15 a.m. it changed.   His face had a grimace.  He would take a huge breath and then not breathe at all for what seemed like an eternity.  This went on 2 or 3 more times and I rang for the nurse.  She came in and took his pulse, then took my hand and told me that he probably wouldn’t make it much longer and that I should call his wife.  It was 4: 22 AM.  I called Teresa and told her that she and Ed needed to get ready and come.

  Gregg passed at 4:35 AM. on March 5, 2005 just 3 days before his 42^nd birthday.  I must tell you that I was right there looking at him and his countenance changed as soon as he took that last breath.  The grimace was gone and in it’s place serenity.  Peace, peace, sweet peace, a gift of God’s love.

  In one of his books, Lehman Strauss writes:  “The Greek word used for departure in II Timothy 4:6 is analusis , and it is used metaphorically in a nautical way as when a vessel pulls up anchor to loose from its moorings and set sail.  Here we are anchored to the hardships and heartaches of this life.   In death the gangway is raised, the anchor is weighed and we set sail for the Golden Shore. “

If you are reading this today and you don’t know this “Lord, Jesus…the Savior” there is no hope of Heaven for you in your present state.  It is my prayer that you will open your heart to His message of salvation.  Romans 10:13 “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.”

“KEEP LOOKING UP”

     Glenda Graves

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